I read online about a mother who was at her wits end because her daughter was hysterical because she wasn’t allowed to get into the oven with the cupcakes they had just made. I have heard the screams of a child who, when presented with some cucumber sticks, simply cannot eat them because she only likes them when they are round. Hysteria. Actual screaming, thrashing, head-exploding hysteria.
And here is what we’ve learned: it’s never about the cucumbers. It’s about the enormity of the trees and the unfamiliarity of the environment; it’s getting to the woods and realising that her friends aren’t there; it’s because she didn’t get tucked in enough times last night. Whatever.
And giving her some round sliced cucumbers is not going to fix anything.